The Wicker Chick
Winter Island remains very much untouched by man, with pristine forests, hills, and shores. There are a few people about, but they mostly keep to the old ways, caring for BEES and living off the honey that they provide. WINTER ISLAND. A quiet island just off the shores of Britain. But it is an island that has a dark secret. For on this island, several Decepticons have gathered together into some sort of strange... cabal. What are they doing on this island? What is their purpose? And what is their leader, Americon, planning?... Blueshift stands next to Americon, wearing his special BEE HAT as he waves a small flag with a BEE on it. "Uh, this is the reading club, yes?" he asks after a while "I hate bees," Rampage snorts from somewhere within the group of Decepticons. "And islands." Robotic Bald Eagle is dressed in sort of Amish raiments, complete with Amish beard. His hands are held together in front of himself in a rather religious fashion. "Yes, Blueshift. We have READING BEES every now and then. But our true purpose is... this!" He holds up honey jar to Blueshift, but it's actually full of energon! "Alas, my plan to convert the honey of bees into energon has been met with... setbacks." Americon gasps at Rampage. "Do not say such things! The bees may hear you!" And ok, fine, he was in bald eagle mode, still works. Blueshift strokes his beard. His beard made of bees. "Hmm. I imagine the fact that energon is deadly poison to bees was a bigger setback than we thought?" Reflector adjusts prisms hanging from hook posts by flowerbeds. The sunlight captured and amplified, redirected to the chloroform laden flower leaves to boost their solar energy intake. Mutely working. Robotic Bald Eagle huffs at Blueshift. "Do not be ridiculous! Bees love energon!" Just then, a little bee buzzes by his head, glowing with pink energy. There's a little ZZZZT and the bee suddenly explodes! "...see?" Blueshift folds his arms as he watches the bee explode. "I see Americon. But then WHAT..." he moves to the side, revealing a gigantic robot bee, covered in pictures of Ronald Reagan's face and glitter "...is the purpose of THIS device?" "W-w-what is that!?" Rampage exclaims while pointing at the giant robot bee. "Is this some sort of joke!? Is this supposed to be funny!?" He grabs the sides of his head and growls, "I...I DON'T GET IT!" Cyclonus is standing here on the island. Cyclonus a follower of Americon? Stranger things have been seen through the years. Or perhaps there is more than meet the eye? The unicronian is standing among all the other Decepticon, waiting for Americon to reveal the reason of this set back. Reflector makes things pretty while awaiting the promised job of Energon Cube handling, his area of expertise. Exploding bees, on the otherhand, are not. He toils like a drone, tending the gardens. Robotic Bald Eagle looks at the Ronald Reagan bee as if there's nothing odd about it, and says, "That is a holy icon devoted to the BEES, particularly the most patriotic ones! And no, Rampage, it is not supposed to be funny, it is DEAD MUTHA EFFIN' SERIOUS!" he yells, wrapping his wings around Rampage's head as he stares him right in the face. He releases Rampage, watches the gardens, and says, "Good job, Reflector! Make sure the Energon carrots don't explode this time!" Catechism is a DCI Inquistor for long, overly complicated reasons that involve Cyclonus exploding. It's probably easier to say that she is a DCI Inquistor because she is entirely unsuited for the position! The Peter Principle in action. However, she has long thought that there is something fishy about Americon or perhaps... eagley. Something that bears investigation. Something that bears INQUISITION. Something that bears... bears? A bear suit in tow, in case she needs a disguise, Catechism prowls the shores of Winter Island, following up on her hunch. Perhaps some kind villagers will welcome her! Blueshift slowly strokes the giant robot bee. "I see Americon, I see. In that case, I don't get THAT then!" Opposite him is another robot bee, but this one is painted red, covered in pictures of Joseph Stalin, weilding hammers and sickles in each arm. "I mean, is that like, the worker bee or something?" Rampage just stares nonplussed at Americon even after he releases him. "Oh. R-right. I, uh, I think I get it now." Then he sees the second giant bee robot and he just sighs. One of the Reflector bodies raises a hand unenthusiastically, missing a finger. Cyclonus wandering the garden while listening at Americon. He stops by the two bee robots and looks at them for a long moment. In fact Cyclonus behavior is quite odd despite the fact that he remains as silent as usual. Robotic Bald Eagle nods at the Joe Stalin bee, again as if there's nothing wrong. "That is the BEE DEVIL, obviously! You are supposed to hurl epithets at it, but I don't know what that word means so I just insult it instead!" His face goes blank for a moment as he hears footsteps. "Hark! We may have a visitor, an unexpected guest to our humble island! Let us welcome this guest in our own unique way... after all, this guest may do us a little favor! Bwahahaha!" Transforming into robot mode--and somehow changing his previous clothes to ones tailored for this mode--he walks towards the sound of the footsteps, waving. "Hail, visitor, welcome to Winter Island!" He holds out his hand to Catechism, and inside his little fist is a bit of ener-honey. "Want some honey?" Americon undergoes a patriotic transformation into his All-American robot mode! Blueshift instantly raises his gun to Catechism. His gun has been converted to fire bees, or steal bees from those who have bees. "Yes Catechism, today you DIE, as Americon said! Ahahaha!" He pauses and looks at Americon. "Ah, we hadn't got to that bit yet, right?" Catechism quickly stashes away the bear suit in subspace, lest she need to do a quickchange disguise. She squints down at Limited Edition Amish Americon with Transforming Clothing Accessories ™ and then over to the honey suspiciously. She shrugs and reaches for the honey, when suddenly, Blueshift threatens to kill her! She takes a few steps back and promptly tries to run up Blueshift, as if he is a gentle incline for a wheelchair. One of Reflectors bodies pauses in his work to look up at the approach of the familiar stranger. A dour expression befalls his face. How unwelcoming. A single note of dischord disrupting the peaceful yet surreal nature the Decepticons have integrated into or with this otherwise calm island sanctuary. Cyclonus reacts like... a robot. He slowly raises his pistol and aims it at Catschism but he doesn't fire, nor those he says anything. Rampage just watches everything unfold in front of him. A lone bee flies into view and Rampage smacks it away with the back of his hand. "Piss off! I wanna see what happened next!" Americon hurriedly shakes his head "no." "No! That part comes later!" Noticing Catechism is within ear-shot, he quickly explains, "Uh... for the disco party!" But as Catechism suddenly attacks Blueshift, Americon drops his honey, gasping, but he especially gasps when the honey hits the ground and explodes. Catechism runs at Blueshift, but Blueshift hears Americon and starts to dance, doing the robot in front of everyone Catechism just does a silly little backflip in the air! As she lands, she gets an unnerving crawling feeling down her central support strut. What is /wrong/ with these people? Cyclonus is reacting like a robot! Wait. He's a robot. Maybe that's normal. Reflector is being so quiet... but Reflector is usually quiet. Rampage is being lazy, but he is a CAT, and everyone knows cats are lazy. Americon and Blueshift are acting crazy, but they're Americon and Blueshift. She rubs her chin and muses aloud, "Perhaps this is all, in fact, perfectly normal." ...but did that honey just explode? Reflector closes the hand with the missing finger, hiding it sight, including his own sight, if not memory. The near-gumby like photographer spy seems to ease back into his work once Catechism verbally signifies an acceptance of how things are presented. Americon watches Blueshift, shrugs, and also does the robot. For added effect, he begins to play "Mr. Roboto," and he can do that because he is a tape. Blueshift then stops dancing, and begins to walk around Catechism, arms behind his back. "You see Catechism, you have wandered into the age-old Decepticon secret society! However, femmes cannot join. So you have two options. The OPERATION... or DEATH!" Cyclonus slowly lower his pistol. There is still no expression on his face...he doesn't seen to be looking at anything. In fact he really looks like someone who's daydreaming. Meanwhile, a bee buzzes perilously close to Catechism... before it EXPLODES! Americon also ceases dancing, and explains, "Basically we have to flash your BIOS. Clear that gender right up." Since he also has an amish beard in this mode, he strokes it idly. "Oh, Cyclonus, get the gender reversification kit for us, won't you?" Catechism gapes in horror - not because there is an ancient secret society that wants to make a man out of her - but because there is a BEE exploding in her FACE! She is stunned and falls to the ground, temporarily knocked out. Cue Disney musical number. Blueshift stands over the fallen Catechism, a bucket of yellow and black striped paint in his hands as he starts to paint her. "You see, BEEtechism, we believe that the first Transformer Primus created was in face, a BEE!" Americon blinks, watching Catechism fall to the ground. "Wow, I thought she was going to run or something." He shrugs, almost disappointed. "Let's get down to business! To save the bees Did they send me a daughter? When I wanted a son? She's the saddest wretch I ever met. But you can bet Before we're through Madame, I'll make a mech Out of you!" Cyclonus mechanicly nods at Americon, totally ignoring the exploding bee. He walks over to a container that's hidden out of view behind a bush. One moment later he's out of the busg, holding a strange device that vaguely looks like a pair or scissors. Reflector looks full of impotent sorrow as he stops working and rises to observe. The status quo on Winter Island is a necessity. Why? It's all very mysterious and haunting. Catechism would be experiencing a vague sense of deja vu about Blueshift kitbashing her into BEEtechism (with BEE technology), if she was conscious. However, she is not, and thus, she safely escapes Americon's musical number. As her hands are rendered black and yellow and stripey, her fingers twitch. Is she coming to? Americon graciously nods to Cyclonus, taking the scissors in hand. "Tranquil as this forest But you'll feel a fire, down there Once I find your bios You are sure, to scream You're a spineless, weak, pathetic 'con C'mon, that bee wasn't that scary Somehow I'll make a mech out of you." Then, Americon looms over Catechism, scissors in hand! Cyclonus hands the scissors to Americon and walks around Catechism to place himself behind her. He is not specificly threatening but it is obvious that he could restrain her if she was trying to escape the "reversification." Catechism suddenly sits up bolt upright, and she looks at her BEE-you-tiful self. She moans, "No, not again! Never again!" as if being turned into a giant bee is something that happens to her often. Catechism does not notice the looming Cyclonus behind her, only that Americon has scissors. She raises a finger and reminds, "Americon, you should never carry scissors points up or run with scissors. Uh... I know." One of her optics twitches madly. Blueshift wheels out a gigantic bee hive, and slowly climbs inside it whilst humming. A bit later, there is a snoring noise from inside Americon looks quizzically at Catechism as he holds the scissors out before himself. He examines the sharp points, which are DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF his optics. "Hmmmm. I dunno. Seems perfectly safe to me! And hey, you interrupted my musical number!" Catechism sighs and waves a hand wearily, "Go on." Seems she won't escape the musical number, after all! And what is with Blueshift inside a bee hive? Oh, right. Blueshift. Cyclonus remains motionless behind Catechism. Something is defintly wrong with him, he acting more like a bee solider than like a decepticon commander. Americon carries on, then. "I.. uh... um..." He looks around. "Hey, guys? What's the next line? I forgot!" He frowns. Blueshift just went to sleep inside of a giant bee hive, Reflector's busy bee-ing (lol!) ominous, and Cyclonus doesn't seem very talkative, either. He rubs his chin as he keeps the scissors pointed precariously at his face. Sure would suck if someone kicked those scissors or something. Reflector withdraws a small handheld tinfoil figure with arms, legs, wings... and a stinger. His other two selves follow suit, one made of soap, the other of twigs. He rubs at them gently with his thumbs. Catechism leans back a bit, finally looking behind her, and she pauses. Cyclonus should be shouting about the will of Galvatron or kicking Ultra Magnus around. He's definitely not right. Catechism look down at her foot, considering that Americon is in front of her, with scissors, and Cyclonus is behind her. She shouts, "The tune goes a little like THIS!" She tries to lever her foot under Americon to fling him over her head and into Cyclonus behind her, where the scissors will hopefully impale them BOTH. As Catechism goes nuts, the beehive Blueshift is in slowly comes to life, trundling over the terrain on wheels as it rounds on Catechism, spraying delicious energo-honey at her Americon is improbably flipped over Catechism and towards Cyclonus! And as soon as Americon hits Cyclonus's face, one of the blades from the scissors goes right through his optic! "AIEEEE!!!" he screams! "Wait a minute, the song doesn't go like that!" Cyclonus doesn't even blink as Americon flies towards him. The scissors dives into his chestplate and...he doesn't move. He doesn't blink, he doesn't do anything even though it would normally be a painful wound. He just remains there motionless waiting for...for what? Reflector turns towards the hive-hydrant and continues to silently hold the figures like totems. Shouldn't he be taking pictures of all this? Catechism wonders when Reflector suddenly became a bee-obsessed kitbasher instead of a photographer. She whirls about, seeing Cyclonus standing just there like a ZOMBEE, and she realises what she must do. Catechism rushes off into the forest and changes into her bear suit. Then, she ambles back to the group, looking casual for a giant bear-bee. Blueshift pops his head out of the hive. "NO YOU FOOL!" he cries as he sees Catechism, and points at a sign. The sign reads 'BEAR MATING SEASON'. Blueshift pops his head back into the tiny hive, and slams the door shut. Americon flails about as he is stuck to Cyclonus via the pair of scissors which has painfully skewered them both. "ARGH! Catch her, Cyclonus! And you too, Reflector! She must not escape to prevent the SACRIFICE!" He points over his shoulder at a trail of smoke drifting up into the sky. Considering he has only one optic and can't turn his head while he's impaled like this, it's kind of impressive how he's able to tell where that smoke trail is. And... uhoh! Is that a bear, roughly the same size as Catechism due to an animation error, sauntering over to her, growling angrily? Reflector turns in unison on the spot and begins the slow patient stalking walk of a creepy mob with all the time in the world... or at least a commercial break about to happen. Cyclonus takes off, not bothered at all by the scissors that stick out of his chest...or by Americon who's still hanging to them. He lands in front of Catebear but it's of course not Catechism, therefore he ignores it and starts to walk towards the forest. Catechism is caught between an angry (amorous?) bear and seemingly brain-washed Decepticons. She could run, but Cyclonus can follow, she knows. Cyclonus is the Decepticons space fighter supreme. Though he is sort of acting like a dip right now. There is only one thing to do: an absolutely absurd spin-kick to the bear's jaw. The bear lets out a startled "AROO!!?" as it is spin-kicked into the air! "Don't let her get away!" Americon cries. "But mind the bears, they seem especially violent today!" Meanwhile, that smoke trail keeps getting blacker and blacker. Is some poor, innocent Decepticon being burned alive even now? Will anyone save him? Reflector fans out, optics searching for Catechism as he gives the kick-happy bear a wide berth and enters the woods. He draws out a set of torches, blazing to burning life, and pitchforks... Cyclonus springs forwards as Americon order the capture of Catechism. Totally ignoring the flying bear, he spreads his arms wide as he descends towards her and tries to grab her with a bear hug hold! Catechism looks over at the smoke, and she lopes off that way, still in her horribly inadvisable bear suit. For some reason, her loping along in a bear suit looks more like dancing and frolicing through the forest. Where there is smoke, there are clues! That is what they say! But ack, Cyclonus brings death from above! She pleads, "Lord Cyclonus! This isn't like you!" Usually, when he flips out, he tries to sacrifice Cliffjumper, not bear-bees! "Snap out of it!" Americon demands, "NO, Cyclonus, don't snap out of it! Continue to... OH GOOOODDDD!!!!" Unfortunately, the problem with Cyclonus bear-hugging Catechism is that Americon is still attached to Cyclonus's chest. Hence, the poor tape is trapped between them, his head impaled even deeper by the blade of the scissors. Fleet has arrived. Cyclonus doesn't seem to snap out of it at all. even though now Americon may wish he did! Whatever happened to him it will take more than words for him to shake off the beebrainwashing! Even with the tape in his way, the unicronian attempts to tighten the hold on Catechism. Reflector stops moving into the woods and converges, silently turning to look back at the commotion and Americon's shouting. He raises his torches and moves to approach. Tetrajet is here in a BEE costume because he's been promised immortality and/or a longer-than-normal life span, along with tasty honey energon. He's probably been in the background up until now. Tetrajet transforms into his Fleet mode. Fleet is also in robot mode, durnit. Catechism ponders what is the most insane way to try to get Cyclonus to let go of her, because in an insane situation, the only options are insane ones. She kicks off the ground, flips in the air, and tries to slam her back to the ground, to thereby wham Cyclonus, who grabbed her from behind, into the ground. She continues to beg, "Lord Cyclonus, what have they done to you?" Americon screeches as Cyclonus--presumably--lands right on top of him, jamming the scissor blade even deeper into his skull! Cyclonus is flipped off his feet and knocked down into the ground. Such an maneuver would normally cause him little damage but as soon as he hits the ground, he seems to be knocked out. His arms release Catechism and falls to his side. Whoosh! Catechism cannot bee-lieve that worked! Soon, she is off, frolicing - running, slaggit, RUNNING - through the woods again, trying to find the source of the fire and perhaps get to the bottom of this terribly mysterious mystery. Reflector stirs as Cyclonus is subdued and his quarry escapes. He reaches down to pull Americon off the impalement bond he's sharing with Cyclonus. Once Catechism has freed herself, she will soon find what's causing that fire. It appears to be a generic seeker tied to a pole, and below him, a flaming pyre! "Hellllp!" the Seeker cries. "I'm an innocent Decepticon and they're trying to burn me alive and I don't understand why!" Americon, meanwhile, says, "Thanks Reflec--SHYEEEEAAAAAAAGHHHH!--tor, I really appreciate it!" as he is pulled off of Cyclonus and the scissor blade. Reflector just tries not to get any on him. Catechism pauses and puts one BEEed hand on her bearsuited hip. She says in a matter of fact tone of voice, "Now that is a lie. We are ALL guilty of something. We're Decepticons. So you must have done something to be tied up to be burned alive. The question is, did you do something so awesome that they are jealous, or did you doing something rubbish and the are punishing you?" "I'm... afraid of glass?" the Seeker says, shrugging. "My name's Vektor, by the way!" Americon dusts himself off after a bit. "Well! We'd better go prepare the SACRIFICE!" he says ominously. But wait, isn't the sacrifice already in the process of being sacrificed? Catechism looks satisfied and growls, "See? Admitting your guilt is the first step toward.... JUSTIFYING WHY YOU ARE BURNING ALIVE." The DCI Inquisitor tosses her head back and laughs, which causes the bear-head to fall off her shoulders and reveals the BEE antennae and her her BEE-patterned helmet. "Whoops. C'mon, I'll get you down. I can throw you at Cyclonus to distract him while I escape and report my findings back to SOUNDWAVE." She moves forward to untie him, bear-claws waving as she reaches. Vektor rubs his wrists as he is freed. "Wow, thanks for saving me! Unfortunately, though, the only thing I have to repay you with is my STUN RAY!" Then, grinning deliriously, he fires a stun beam at the Inquisitor! Catechism is stunned. Again. This is not her day. Perhaps Catechism should have learned, but no! As she falls, she realises that this may have all been a trap - Vektor was probably in on the scheme, to lure her out to the fire so that she could be set on fire instead. It is sort of a stupid plan, she reflects. What if she hadn't shown up at all? Then Vektor would have been burned down. Then she hits the ground, and she's out again. Will she wake up a man? Commercial break to skip ahead for a reveal? Reflector is surrounding the work in progress, lending all 6 hands to what needs be done. LATER, AFTER THE COMMERCIAL... Catechism may wake up to discover herself surrounded by cultists, and on the ground before a giant wicker effigy! "Greetings, Catechism! So glad you could fall into my trap!" Americon says to her, smirking evilly. "I knew you would come, I knew you would dress up as a bear, I knew you would try to save the seeker before he burned to death, and I knew he would hit you with his stun ray and not miss, because if all of those things didn't happen perfectly, well, it would be really embarassing!" Catechism can only nod numbly and agree, feeling rather foolish, "Yes, that would have been rather embarassing. As Soundwave's cassette, you must have inherited some of his uncanny planning abilities!" But there is one thing Americon hasn't factored into the equation. Americon smiles, nodding proudly. "Yes, I am quite brilliant, am I not?" He gestures towards Reflector and Fleet, who are hopefully still being drawn by the animators at this point. "Bring her to the Effigy!" he says. Blueshift emerges from his beehive, and stands before Catechism, waving a flaming torch. "Now Catechism, you will die!" ONE YEAR FROM NOW: Blueshift sits in a gigantic courtroom. The court (all Decepticons are watching this adventure happen on the screen) "This evidence is false!" cries Blueshift. "It has been made up! Besides, she deserved to be burnt alive!" Blueshift then gurns as the camera does a shaky zoom onto him. Reflector lifts the sacrifice and begins toting towards the effigy like a group of pallbearers. The totems still held in one free hand each. The time has come. Catechism is thrown inside the wicker effigy, to doubtless play out the role of the wicker chick, being the only fe-male Decepticon on the island. Curse her traitorous BIOS! But wait... aren't young eagles called chicks? Is Americon really old enough to be considered an adult eagle? Trying to stall to buy herself time, she points out, "Perhaps you are reading the prophecy the wrong way. Perhaps, by chick, you are actually looking for a young eagle," she points at Americon, "like HIM!" Someday, Blueshift, Catechism will have her revenge, and it will be served lukewarm, with a side of energon honey! With her other hand, she pulls out her bomb-making kit, behind her back. Dun dun dun! Americon shakes his head. "No, I'm pretty sure we need to put a CHICK inside the effigy, otherwise the prophecy will not be fulfilled and the bees will keep exploding due to all the energon we pump into them!" As if to demonstrate his point, a glowing bee explodes behind him. "And as you are a CHICK, i.e., a female, we must sacrifice you! Now, use the lift to pull her up into the head of the effigy thing!" Cyclonus somewhere all alone in the woods, Cyclonus stirs in his sleep. Reflector 1, 2, and 3 oblige the command. A rickety sounding yet obviously strong pulley system starts to lift Catebeeism upwards through the structure. The blank stares of the focussed Reflector unmovable as they watch her sent towards her doom! Blueshift starts to crank Catechism up into the head of the wicker effigy. "Soon you will burn and our land will be purified!" he cries ONE YEAR LATER "See how Blueshift mocks his fellow Decepticons!" cries the prosecution, the shadowy figure known only as BLACKSHIFT. "See how he attempts to murder his superiors!" Blueshift simply puts his arms behind his head and smiles, leaning back in his chair. "Oh, it's all a trick, you'll see. I'm wrong-footing Americon to get on his side, and then I'll rescue Catechism!" NOW Blueshift lowers his torch and sets the effigy aflame ONE YEAR LATER Blueshift stares at the screen. "Aaaw crap" Catechism groans and protests, "But Americon, young eagles /are/ chicks! Search your feelings; you know it to be true." Hmm, this won't be fancy, so she should keep it simple, maybe just a grenade. Behind he back, she rummages through the demolition kit, looking for the C4 and some wires. "Besides. You tried to turn me into a man, earlier! What was up with that? Is this man business some kind of MIND CONTROL? Did you turn Cyclonus into a man, too?" And then the effigy catches on fire, thanks to Blueshift. Oh slag. Must build faster! Americon shakes his head, transforming into eagle mode, and his clothes again rearranging themselves. "NO! I am a year and a half old or so, and that is very very old in eagle years! As for the gender operation thing, uh... well... I knew you would escape and not have your gender changed, because I am really smart! Also, stop trying to use logic, damn you! We're a cult, and we're not supposed to do that sort of thing!" Americon's robot legs pop out metallic feather-like objects as they and his lower torso split apart, also revealing an eagle head. The arms and robot head join the main body, and his guns convert into tail feathers and rocket launchers. Americon is now a bald eagle! "Wait! Wait. Wait. Wait!" Blueshift turns to Americon. "We're a CULT? I thought this was a Ponzi scheme?!" Reflector steps back, getting a better view of the pyro-ceremony. Suddenly, Cyclonus's optics turn bright red as the unicronian is reactivated. Still lying on the ground he shouts, "AAAAAAMMMMMEEEEEERRRRRIIIIIIIIICOOOOOOOON!!!!" and then he slowly rises to his feet like a vampire coming out of his casket as the night falls. Catechism rails, "You shouldn't even have adult plummage yet! You aren't even near 5! You, Americon, are the Wicker Chick!" She brings her hands in front of her, revealing that she is holding a grenade, even as a shout of 'Americon' booms from the woods. She bandwagons, "That's right! Release me from this shoddy, flammable cage of weak planet material, or I will blow you up and your little Reflector, too!" Combat: Catechism has created a grenade: "Not Her Best Work"! Blueshift's gun wavers back between Catechism and Americon. "But but... now I am confused!" Reflector seems unphased by either Catechism logic or Cyclonus vocal boomings. Geezus, where's the personality dude? Robotic Bald Eagle frowns. "Now, I'm sure Cyclonus is just lost and trying to figure out where I went off to!" So, helpfully, he says, "I'M OVER HERE, CYCLONUS!" Then he responds to Catechism's accusations. "No, no, a year and a half is fine for a bald eagle, I'm sure of it. Don't let her confuse you with FACTS, gentlemen! And don't think you can threaten me with a mere grenade! I've survived insane injuries far worse than anything you can muster!" Blueshift wavers his gun between Catechism and Americon, and then blasts Americon in the face. He pauses. "Look, that was just shooting Americon, it wasn't a choice or anything, I might still shoot at you too!" Combat: Blueshift misses Robotic Bald Eagle with his Speed Stealing Gun attack! Catechism seizes the confusion and encourages, "Yes, Blueshift! Feel the confusion! Let it empower you! Use your confused power to deliver a completely crazy roundhouse kick to Americon!" She then waves the grenade a bit more, as if getting ready to log it at Americon. A pause. "Or shoot him, that is nice, too." A wince. "And miss." Cyclonus takes off and heads towards Americon's position. His face is still emotionless but his optics burn in anger and soon he lands among the cultist, right in face of Americon, "Explain yourself" he says in a low cold threatening voice. Robotic Bald Eagle ducks under the speed stealing blast! "Woah, Blueshift! I thought we agreed that, as a cult, we are vehemently opposed to thinking logically! Why do you think I didn't have Shockwave indoctrinated?" Then who should appear right in front of him? "Cyclonus! Oh, you're talking again. Look, I'll explain myself in a bit, but you could do something about Catechism? We need to set her on fire, but we can't do that while she's threatening to throw grenades at everyone." Catechism is inside a burning wicker cage, holding a grenade, but she manages to report, "Lord Cyclonus, sir! This was all an elabourate ruse on Americon's part so he could throw me inside a fragile little cage and set me on fire! I haven't figured out yet how he brainwashed you, but are you feeling... more like a man than usual? This is important, sir!" Blueshift looks surprised as Cyclonus appears. "Uh-oh, I need a quick way out!" he gasps. And then, shouting he raises his gun to his head. "Blueshift you are under arrest!" he shouts, before shooting himself through the head Combat: Blueshift strikes himself with his Speed Stealing Gun attack! Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Blueshift's Agility. (Crippled) Blueshift then collapses in a heap :( Cyclonus looks over his shoulder at Catechism, "A man? I am a Decepticon warrior and it's all that matter! Now get out of this cage!" Reporting his attention back on Americon he adds, "I'll do something about her...with your help." Then he attempts to grabs the bald eagle to throw him at the cage. Combat: Cyclonus misses Robotic Bald Eagle with his Grab attack! Reflector raises his totems up high pointing them towards Catechism above. The tinfoil bee-man crinkles. The twig bee-man crackles. The soap bee-man melts just a little... and slips from his grasp. He looks down and steps forward to reach down for it. ~SLIP~ Reflector loses his footing on the soap and tumbles backwards into his other two bodies like bowling pins. Robotic Bald Eagle is flung at the effigy, but manages to fly out of the way just at the last moment! "Woah, Cyclonus, that is not cool!" He soars about the head of the effigy, cawing discontentedly! Catechism rubs her chin with her free hand and muses, "I guess Americon didn't mess with Cyclonus's BIOS, then." She then winds back an elbow, and with a 'hiiii-ya', she bashes a hole in the burning wicker cage. It is a mystery why she didn't do this sooner. Nonetheless, she escapes, carefully stepping over Blueshift's crumpled form. Then Reflector falls over like bowling pins. Is the brainwashing wearing off, or does Reflector just have terrible balance? Cyclonus grunts as Americon manages to avoid the cage. He also totally ignores Blueshift...for now, "Catechism. Explain what is going here!" He won't admit it but he doesn't remember how he got on the island which disturbes him greatly, "As for you Americon...get down here before I lose my cool." Robotic Bald Eagle does indeed come down and land... on Cyclonus's shoulder. "Yeah? Whatcha need, Cyclonus? Little spiritual guidance? Maybe some honey-gon?" Catechism already did explain it, but she recaps again, "Sir! Americon is leading a brainwashed cult that believes that by setting a 'chick' on fire, they will prevent the energon-stuffed bees from exploding." Boy, Catechism feels dumber, just saying all of that. "I'm still not sure how Americon pulled off the brainwashing, however. Try tugging on his head, to see if it is a mask?" Reflector reassembles himself back to conciousness and a coherant state resumes. He rubs at his head and looks around. "Not good..." Cyclonus listens carefully but all of this doesn't make sense. With a swift move of his left hand, he slaps Americon off his shoulder, "You wanted to sacrifice the inquisitor to prevent energon bees from exploding??? Are you MAD! No don't answer. Give me one good reason to not obliterate you." Robotic Bald Eagle caws as he is swatted off of Cyclonus's shoulder. "Um... well... uh... I did manage to make a fair amount of energon?...." he says from the ground, shrugging his wings. Usually, the reason why people leave cassettes alone is that Soundwave is a scary motherboard fragger to offend. However, Cyclonus is scarier than Soundwave. However, Soudnwave is Catechism's boss. However, Cyclonus is right here. Cyclonus wins! Catechism raises an arm gun and points it at Americon, wishing she had a stun ray, like Vektor. She awaits judgement from Cyclonus. Just one word. Oh, and she is still holding a grenade. Reflector accesses his photographic memory record, glimpsing the events leading up to this moment in a slideshow like format... Cyclonus looks down at Americon, "And that's the only reason why you're still alive. I'll contact Ratbat to see how useful your little operation was to the empire." He turns to face Catechism, "Bring him back to New Crystal City. I'll let you devise a worthy punishment for his actions." Reflector gasps at some of the images... and he's not easily shocked. Robotic Bald Eagle phews, wiping his brow with a wing. Close one! Rampage has left. Catechism could shoot Americon in any number of painful ways, but she concludes that the /best/ way to capture him actually involves bring out yet another weapon. So she grabs her whip, bringing her total weapon count up to four: two arm guns, a grenade, and a whip. She snaps out the whip, intending to snare Americon and drag him off. She salutes Cyclonus with her grenade hand, grinning, "Thank you, sir! I may know just the thing..." Combat: Catechism sets her defense level to Fearless. Combat: Catechism misses Robotic Bald Eagle with her Whiplash Whirlwind attack! -5 Robotic Bald Eagle urks as he is ensnared by the whip, but fortunately, his light body allows him to be dragged along without any harm to himself. Catechism takes Not Her Best Work. Cyclonus shakes his head and sighs, "I will see you back in NCC. I'm expecting a full report of Americon's punishment. If Soundwave objects... send him to me." Then without adding anything, he leaps into the air and transfoms before blasting off towards the Decepticon base. And that is why Cyclonus wins! Catechism reels Americon in and attempts to stuff him inside her cockpit. She'll be taking the water route back to the Decepticon base. She barks to Reflector, "Don't suppose /you/ know how the brainwashing worked?" Robotic Bald Eagle is stuffed inside awkwardly! "Bwuufffff!" he says, limbs and whatnot awkwardly splayed everywhere inside the cockpit. Reflector scowls and chalks it up to thus: "Strangers with candy." He grumbles. Catechism sighs. Strangers with candy? She grumbles, "Oh, Americon. Why can't you use your outlandish plots against the Autobots, instead of your own people? You know we only ever use our weapon of the day once!" Then, she transforms and plunges off the coast of the island, into the briny sea. Catechism transforms to her jet mode, which is quite astoundingly simple for the coneheaded model that she is. Catechism took you. Catechism drops you. NCC Dungeon The blues and violets that blanket the city darken here, edging into midnight blue and indigo. The suffusing, scintillating light dims, and only scraps and snatches of illumination are available, hinting at forms rather than revealing the truth of structure. Will-o-the-wisp lights flicker in and out, suggesting sparking wires or perhaps the sinister optics of the security cameras. When activated, the translucent turquoise force fields cast more light than anything else. The long shadow-silhouettes of bars fashioned like rib cages are cast on the ground. The filigreed manacles are deceptively slender, but pound for pound, their grasp is far stronger than spider-silk, nigh unbreakable. From the ceiling hang the various tools of torture, perhaps the teeth of an iron maiden here and the cage of a gibbet there. THE END